This life we live everyday often can bring us down in a heartbeat. There are many people out there that very negative views on our world and the people that live here. There is always that person, the one that cares to much about there appearance, the one that cares about there social status. Im here to kinda say, those days should come to an end.
I wish people would wake up in the morning and just be happy they are here. Some of our lives arent bad at all yet we complain and put things down. I wish there was just those few people like this that would stand up for everything thats right, to say they will put an end to that and have a new life. Yes i understand we all complain, we all feel the same emotions as other, but what happens when we channel them differently?
We have a God in this world that cares about us, no matter what. Some reading this may not agree, but its my belief and i hold it to myself unless i feel a chance to speak the word.(im happy to talk to anyone about it if they want it) But yes He loves us. These negative thoughts only bring more unwanted hate into this world. I want people to take a stand, proclaim a positive thought process, bring joy to yourself and if you have the same beliefs i do then speak the word of God.
We have one life, lets not spend it worrying and suffering in hatred and guilt. LIVE POSITVE.
Monday, February 28, 2011
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Taking a turn.
I usually go by my own advice by saying you should accept a friend no matter what the changes are, but this time it bothered me to the point where i couldn't accept it. Things just started falling apart in this friendship, drugs, lies and walls. I just recently stopped myself from trying to do drugs. I realized that i like to live for God, i cant really do that stoned.
So this problem between friends rooted from something more than just a little bit of arguing. I watched my best friend be completely torn down by this girl while dating he dated her. I watched her slump down more too. This could have been the start of her change, that has now brought us to where we are now. she thinks so many things that arent really here, i wish she would see some light in all of this. As friends we told her, and she failed to listen.
Im pretty much done with me and her's friendship. i know who my friends are at the moment, shes not one of them. I have great things right now, this loss of a friend wont bring me down. I got my bestfriend always with me, i got this girl that i like, and even though i like her i can come to her as a friend as well, im even making new friends and building more with other people as well.
This can be the start of something new, this week has a been a little heavy on my heart and i know God is helping me. Its taking a big turn and i can tell its for the better. The prayers said yesterday were answered, and now i just want to embrace this life i have and build for the good.
Friday, February 11, 2011
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Something Inside.
If you are someone like me, you have a lot of different feelings all the time. Sometimes, these are feelings that stay inside of you forever, refusing to leave even though you try to push them out as hard as you can. Anticipation is such a strong feeling, to me this is like waiting for something you're not sure is going to happen.
Anticipation is in us, and sometimes we fail to realize. We wait and wait, anticipating something great we really want to happen, and then...it doesn't happen and we are left with sorrow. A lot of search for someone, to make us happier than we normally are, we look and look and look and sometimes we come up empty handed. We only have one question, and that question is why?
Our search for someone or something that makes us happy is never ending. The anticipation for something amazing in our lives never goes away, it sticks to us like glue. Its always in the back of your mind, refusing to leave. Im starting to think maybe this is me just being my weird old self, but i cant be sure. For my friends that know me, they know how i am, how i think, how i act towards different things. I really wish i could just let go of my worries and anticipation for my wants. I wish i could look at things on the brighter side, i really want to.
I should just be happy im alive, instead of letting my worries and wants flood through me every day.
Matthew 6:31-32
Do not worry then, saying, 'What will we eat?' or 'What will we drink?' or 'What will we wear for clothing? For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.
Anticipation is in us, and sometimes we fail to realize. We wait and wait, anticipating something great we really want to happen, and then...it doesn't happen and we are left with sorrow. A lot of search for someone, to make us happier than we normally are, we look and look and look and sometimes we come up empty handed. We only have one question, and that question is why?
Our search for someone or something that makes us happy is never ending. The anticipation for something amazing in our lives never goes away, it sticks to us like glue. Its always in the back of your mind, refusing to leave. Im starting to think maybe this is me just being my weird old self, but i cant be sure. For my friends that know me, they know how i am, how i think, how i act towards different things. I really wish i could just let go of my worries and anticipation for my wants. I wish i could look at things on the brighter side, i really want to.
I should just be happy im alive, instead of letting my worries and wants flood through me every day.
Matthew 6:31-32
Do not worry then, saying, 'What will we eat?' or 'What will we drink?' or 'What will we wear for clothing? For the Gentiles eagerly seek all these things; for your heavenly Father knows that you need all these things.
Wednesday, February 9, 2011
Some good Ole Boredom.
Have you ever thought what it would be like if your life was a movie? You're the main character in some sticky situation you want to get out of or better yet whatever roll you want to play. A lot of us view things in repetitive manners, just like a movie.
If you watch enough movies, you can start predicting the story lines to a lot of other films. I kinda think some people look at there lives like that. We do the same things every day and eventually we can guess what is going to happen the next day and the next day and so forth.
What if we were challenged to live differently every day? To explore something new, to break another wall in our lives. Instead of living like we are in some repetitive movie, why don't we step out of our comfort zones and live like we are going to die in any minute. If you think about that last statement its very true.
So i kinda wanna try this for myself. I want to try to be more out there, not to myself all the time. I want to do things different maybe, not have everything the same. For the people that are going to read this, i kinda hope you would want to try this as well. It probably will be a little hard, but it could be interesting eh?
John 3:30-He must become greater, and i must become less.
If you watch enough movies, you can start predicting the story lines to a lot of other films. I kinda think some people look at there lives like that. We do the same things every day and eventually we can guess what is going to happen the next day and the next day and so forth.
What if we were challenged to live differently every day? To explore something new, to break another wall in our lives. Instead of living like we are in some repetitive movie, why don't we step out of our comfort zones and live like we are going to die in any minute. If you think about that last statement its very true.
So i kinda wanna try this for myself. I want to try to be more out there, not to myself all the time. I want to do things different maybe, not have everything the same. For the people that are going to read this, i kinda hope you would want to try this as well. It probably will be a little hard, but it could be interesting eh?
John 3:30-He must become greater, and i must become less.
Good Stuff
My future days are going to be filled with greatness, i dont plan on letting much stop that. Everyone needs to be happy, sadness is not the way to go in life. Psalm 139:23, 24..Search me God, and know my heart; test me and my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting. (:
Tuesday, February 8, 2011
Music
Im curious to know why certain genres of music click to people. When i think about it, it almost seems stereotypical, like there are hardcore kids, scene kids, kids that listen to rap and kids that listen to mainly mainstream. Sometimes its like we split ourselves up depending on what type of music we listen to.
Its interesting that we do that. Music sometimes influences people like no other. Me for example, i always have music on, its what i do pretty much all day. So its very obvious on how we react to music, we need it. I wanna know what music does for people. Does it make you happy? Does it calm you down when you're mad? Is it your escape? Anyone can answer yes to all my questions. Religion and Music rule our world.
Its interesting that we do that. Music sometimes influences people like no other. Me for example, i always have music on, its what i do pretty much all day. So its very obvious on how we react to music, we need it. I wanna know what music does for people. Does it make you happy? Does it calm you down when you're mad? Is it your escape? Anyone can answer yes to all my questions. Religion and Music rule our world.
Again
As i sit here finishing whats left of my hot pocket, ive realized im filled with guilt again. Guilt over what ive done, it just feels like the walls are closing in on me and i have no escape. I wish i hand would come up out of nowhere, just so i have hope to get out of this black pit. I hate my lustful thoughts, i want them to be gone so they cant harm me anymore.
Its this race im running with myself, nobody else but me. Im constantly struggling, i wish i had a helping hand. Its making me crazy and i can feel it. Im letting myself down again, letting whoever is around me down. I WANT THESE THOUGHTS GONE FOREVER. They are hurting me.
A Sick Day
So being sick kind of sucks. The thing thats worse than being sick though is the boredom that comes with staying home from school. My plans for today are pretty much repetitive, im going to sit here, listen to say anything and think about things that float around in my confusing mind. I got a lot off yesterday by starting this blog, im kind of glad i was introduced to it by my friends.
This post though, is mostly out of boredom since i have nothing to do. Ive already commented random statuses on facebook for some entertainment, but thats not really fun anymore. Maybe i'll watch some movies today, write some music and practice some good old drums. Really fun time here.
This post though, is mostly out of boredom since i have nothing to do. Ive already commented random statuses on facebook for some entertainment, but thats not really fun anymore. Maybe i'll watch some movies today, write some music and practice some good old drums. Really fun time here.
Monday, February 7, 2011
My mistakes
I get so overwhelmed with myself sometimes. I get frustrated, annoyed and filled with guilt over some of my decisions. I also always find myself running in circles over what i want to do. Every day my mind is filled with the same thoughts, and going through my day at school they only get worse.
I often blame some of the things i do for the things i don't have. For example me not being in a relationship because of something i did that day. Now i dont believe in karma for those that will read this and say its karma. I could care less what it is. Back to the point, i hate that train of thought. It's not even a truth, my mind is just making it up as an excuse and i dont understand it.
I look at myself and sometimes think im not good enough, i think "oh hey my body is in a weird shape, im not as good as a drummer as i want to be, oh and i dont fit into this t-shirt right. Its just a little too long". I dont want these thoughts taking over me everyday as they do most days. For the longest time i thought i was a little crazy, but that could also be because of the amounts of say anything i listen to sometimes.
I feel like i should be closer to God, but i always think of things in this world that dont matter, and they stop me. I want to be able to say "this isnt going to stop me from being closer with God", but sometimes it does stop me. I want to have a new start, write a whole new chapter in my life. I want to worship God, i want to be there for all my friends no matter what the gossip is on there minds. I want to notice a mistake and flaw of mine and turn it into something beautiful, and thats what im going to try to do.
This post was mostly ramble of whats on my mind and what pulls me down, but i know these things wont hurt me any longer. My mind will be spirit filled and i will be happy, no more sadness and frustration. I know i can turn it all around.
I often blame some of the things i do for the things i don't have. For example me not being in a relationship because of something i did that day. Now i dont believe in karma for those that will read this and say its karma. I could care less what it is. Back to the point, i hate that train of thought. It's not even a truth, my mind is just making it up as an excuse and i dont understand it.
I look at myself and sometimes think im not good enough, i think "oh hey my body is in a weird shape, im not as good as a drummer as i want to be, oh and i dont fit into this t-shirt right. Its just a little too long". I dont want these thoughts taking over me everyday as they do most days. For the longest time i thought i was a little crazy, but that could also be because of the amounts of say anything i listen to sometimes.
I feel like i should be closer to God, but i always think of things in this world that dont matter, and they stop me. I want to be able to say "this isnt going to stop me from being closer with God", but sometimes it does stop me. I want to have a new start, write a whole new chapter in my life. I want to worship God, i want to be there for all my friends no matter what the gossip is on there minds. I want to notice a mistake and flaw of mine and turn it into something beautiful, and thats what im going to try to do.
This post was mostly ramble of whats on my mind and what pulls me down, but i know these things wont hurt me any longer. My mind will be spirit filled and i will be happy, no more sadness and frustration. I know i can turn it all around.
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